Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Betting on Bailouts! Place YOUR Bets! Dear Europe, CONTAIN YOURSELF!


(I'm betting on red, and on bailouts, let's get a bailout going Europe! Woo hoo!  And put us outta our misery!)  New word on the street: Buy Buy BUY (but only if a bailout is imminent)

Dow Average Poised For Biggest 2012 Gain On Stimulus Bets

U.S. stocks rose, sending the Dow Jones Industrial Average toward its biggest gain in 2012, on bets global policy makers will act to stimulate the economy.
Bank of America Corp. surged 5.8 percent to pace gains in financial shares. Caterpillar Inc. (CAT) and Hewlett-Packard Co. (HPQ) advanced at least 2 percent. Home Depot Inc. (HD), the largest U.S. home-improvement retailer, climbed 3 percent after raising its stock repurchase plan by $500 million for fiscal 2012. Chesapeake Energy Corp. (CHK) rallied 4.9 percent as the company was said to be in advanced talks to sell pipelines to Global Infrastructure Partners for more than $4 billion.
All 10 groups in the S&P 500 rose today as commodity, financial and technology shares had the biggest gains. Photograph: Landov
June 6 (Bloomberg) -- Bloomberg's Carol Massar reports that Facebook's IPO has had the worst two-week performance of the 30 largest new stock offerings since January 2011. Facebook's 27 percent drop is more than three times larger than the next biggest fall of 8 percent registered by Oaktree Capital Group. She reports on Bloomberg Television's "In The Loop." (Source: Bloomberg)
Traders work on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange. Photographer: Richard Drew/AP Photo
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The Standard & Poor’s 500 Index advanced 1.8 percent to 1,308.42 at 2:35 p.m. New York time, rising 2.4 percent in three days. The Dow average increased 225.54 points, or 1.9 percent, to 12,353.49 today and was poised for its biggest gain on a closing basis since Dec. 20. Trading in S&P 500companies was up 7.7 percent from the 30-day average at this time of day.
“People are viewing central banks as very aware of the weakness of the global economy and looking for ways to deal with that,” said Michael Holland, chairman and founder of New York- based Holland & Co. His firm oversees more than $4 billion. (hmmm, OF COURSE THEY'RE AWARE OF IT.  Question is, will they ACT?...Hope springs eternal) “We’ve had a major selloff, valuations are low and that helps to lift the market on a day like today.”
Stocks rose for a third day after the S&P 500 fell as much as 9.9 percent from this year’s peak in April amid concern about a global slowdown. Earlier this week, the index traded at 12.9 times reported earnings, the cheapest valuation in six months, according to data compiled by Bloomberg.

Stimulus Bets

Equities gained as European Central Bank President Mario Draghi said officials stand ready to act as the euro region’s growth outlook worsens. (Lights, camera, ACTION) Federal Reserve Bank of Atlanta PresidentDennis Lockhart said extending Operation Twist (and shout?), the program to lengthen maturities of debt on the central bank’s balance sheet, is an “option on the table.” (I'm taking a call option on the options on the table....shorting Greece tho)
The Fed said in its Beige Book survey of business conditions today that the U.S. economy maintained a moderate pace of growth as factory output rose and the real-estate market improved. The report gives central bankers anecdotal evidence on the state of the world’s largest economy two weeks before they meet in Washington.
“There’s always hope that some magic tool would be found,” (I believe in magic, do YOU?) said Ron Florance, managing director of investment strategy for Wells Fargo Private Bank. His firm manages $169 billion. “There’s no sense of any economic recovery on the near-term horizon for Europe. I would be surprised if the Federal Reserve isn’t already having a contingency plan if everything unravels in Europe.”  (IF?  or WHEN?  duh duh)

‘Big-Time’

Warren Buffett, the billionaire chairman of Berkshire Hathaway Inc. (BRK/A), said he expects the U.S. economy to avoid another recession as long as Europe can contain its debt crisis (EUROPE! CONTAIN YOURSELF!). There won’t be a recession “unless events in Europe develop in some way that spills over here big-time,” Buffett said yesterday at the Economic Club of Washington, D.C.
I don't know, might we be a little overly optimistic that Europe may actually DO SOMETHING about recapping their banks and containing themselves before we have another repeat of 2008, this time from across the pond?  Only time will tell.  But their history has not been so stellar thus far...just saying...and China's slowdown cause of you A-holes isn't helping ANYONE...
So Europe, for the love of Christ and your own MOTHER, let's solve this shit already...by throwing more money at failing economies who don't pay their taxes or have jobs.  There, that should do it.  Done and done.  Saved by bailouts (from Germany), round two.  And bail us out of our misery, puh-lease.
Sincerely,
The United States of the World and Dogs Too xoxo
PS.  We believe in magic.  Do you?  Lovin' Spoonful does.

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