Missing: iPad4. If Found: Please Return to God

Missing: iPad4.  If Found: return to God ASAP.
Reward: Eternal Redemption.

At your earliest convenience. Address: Heaven or Steve Job's Empire in the Sky that he sometimes shares with God when he's not busy borrowing God's iPad and not returning it.

Dear iPad4:

Please come back to me soon, oh, how I miss you so. You had me at "hello". Surfing the Internet without you is so dull, lifeless an endless line of monotony. How I miss your sleek lines, your lightweight design.

iPad4, "you complete me."

Return to me soon, darling, so that our love may grow ever stronger. And, for the love of God, er me, stop running off with Steve Jobs all the time. You know how jealous that makes me.

I look forward with anticipation to your speedy return and have faith that you will heed my call. I believe in you, iPad4.  Believe in me.  Until me meet again, God, er me, Speed.

Forever Yours,

God